Ways & How

How to Get a Divorce

How to Get a Divorce

If you are in an abusive relationship, it is only right to seek a divorce. It is not good for you nor for your children, if you have any, to remain in that marriage. If you are a victim of repeated infidelity and you are clearly emotional and psychologically abused by your spouse, a divorce might be what you need. If you can prove that your spouse is psychologically incapacitated, you might have a case to bring to the court. Remember, however, that marriage is a sacred institution and getting a divorce should not be taken lightly. Cases of infidelity are growing everyday and for a spouse to keep away from it requires commitment and the support of friends and family. Be sure that the problem in your marriage is not you, otherwise getting a divorce is not going to help you. Seek godly counsel. Before you decide to get a divorce, ask yourself: Do I really want this?  Those who have opted for a divorce know how difficult the process is, especially when kids are involved. It has potentially damaging effects on children of divorced parents. If one has to get a divorce, he or she has to be prepared for it emotionally, psychologically and financially.

Yes, getting a divorce can be costly. Perhaps it is better to salvage the relationship while you both still can. The thought that you did all you could do to save your marriage will enable you to better move on later should divorce be your last option. So, pray about your decision and talk to your husband if possible.

  1. Stay focused on the problem. If you have sought a counselor, avoid repeating yourself and spending hours on the same rants, especially when you have to pay the person for listening to your case.

  2. Consult a lawyer. A divorce case can be complicated. It can involve property transfer and custody issues. Make sure you know your rights and chances. Read testimonies of others who went through the same pursuit and who had the same claims for divorce as you. Learn from their experiences and consider their advices.

  3. Be ready. A divorce can be costly. You will need to prepare pertinent data for your lawyer: both you and your spouse’s  personal information, including social security numbers; your children’s personal information; marriage certificates, and certified copies of divorce decree from any previous marriages, if applicable. You will also need all other pertinent information or proof of previous separation, counseling sought and reconciliation attempts. You will also need to supply your lawyer with information about your present earning capabilities, proofs of income tax paid and history of loans or mortgages.

    If you are physically abused by your spouse, a separation agreement will be good for you while the divorce proceeding is ongoing. The petition for dissolution of marriage is usually facilitated when both spouses have agreed to live separately. Take this time to reflect on your marriage and talk to your children to help them understand.

  4. Be informed. When the summon that states your grounds for seeking divorce is served to the other party, you will have to appear in court. The other party is given 35 days to appear and answer or respond to your complaints. Ask your lawyer what the procedure entails and know the details. If you have children, especially young children, be sure to spend as much time with them as this could be a devastating experience in their lives.

Knowing how to get a divorce is not enough. You should also know why you are getting a divorce and how this might help you, your spouse and your children. The choice you make today will determine your lives in the future.


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