Ways & How

how to resolve family conflict

how to resolve family conflict how to resolve family conflict

It’s so true that we can’t choose our family, but this is not a bad thing. In fact, it’s always a blessing in disguise. If there are troublemakers, there are also peacemakers. How to resolve family conflict needs a little bit of effort and a lot of understanding. If you happen to be the middle person, use family occasions to talk things out without making a special mention of the problem and the people involved. Family issues are actually not that serious when members of the family address them together. Follow these steps for a smoother operation:

  1. You can’t solve any problem if you don’t really know the accurate facts. This is why you need to investigate casually by getting the opinions of the members over a situation. Make sure not to allow offensive comments that can trigger a fight. We all have different emotional levels. Some can get carried away easily while others are so insensitive. The moderator should lead the discussion by asking questions. When heated arguments are beginning to erupt, be creative in changing the topic.



  2. Once the problem is identified, determine the root cause or the main person causing the problem. Measure the degree of the damage done. Does this cause some members to be estranged from the group? Are people avoiding each other? Where do you stand in the situation?

  3. Do not make judgments or be vocal in taking one side. Remember that you are the moderator, and you’re supposed to be neutral. Psychologically speaking, troublemakers in the family are victims of misfortunes of the past, perhaps by other family members in authority or by some unavoidable circumstances such as series of bad luck incidents, diseases, or failed personal relationships.

  4. When you have all the facts, organize a meeting again following the next family occasion and present the case. Conduct it in such a way that you are trying to be helpful with the situation of the troublemaker. Perhaps offering an opportunity to boost his or her livelihood or getting volunteers to help the one with possible health issues to have a general checkup by accepting some contributions from the rest of the family members. Most conditions in these kinds of situations are traced back from depression. Do not, however, suggest point blank that the person needs psychiatric help. You can be misunderstood accusing the member of being mentally sick.

  5. The biggest solution for most if not all family conflicts is love. We all have something to do with a member’s success or failure. It might be something that we’ve done or haven’t done at all that contributes to the situation. Since pride is eminent in many human beings, the offer of help must not be very obvious, but the caring aspect must be demonstrated fairly well. Rough actions might be the way of the person screaming for help!

  6. Have a heart to heart talk with selected family members whom you feel have the greatest capacity to help the troubled one. Put your heads together for the necessary actions. Plans are nothing without implementation. Resources, time, and efforts are needed. You will need all the help you can get from everyone for the person in question.

At the end of the day, you might be surprised how the rest of the family members are becoming more generous in sharing what they can offer. How to resolve family conflict is an essential goal to master because life is like a wheel. Family members can take turns in being on top or down. If you are up now and you’re helping a loved one who’s down right now, you will be assured and confident that you will get the help you need when it’s your turn down at the bottom. That’s what a family is for.

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